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| Disclaimer-I don't own anybody you recognize. Least of all Brian Vickers. Although...I would like to have his babies.  Chapter 3-“Come home Princess. I need you. I can’t race without you.”
The words from Brian’s last voicemail were ringing in my head as I saw his car smash hard into the wall for the second week in a row.
“Please be okay, please be okay. Dear God, let him be ok,” I chanted as I watched the TV screen.
He hadn’t put down his window net yet and I was starting to get freaked.
“YOU PUT YOUR WINDOW NET DOWN RIGHT FUCKING NOW BRIAN LEE!” I yelled at the TV as I stood up and shook my finger at his car, like I thought he could either hear or see me.
I guess he could hear me, because as soon as the words were out of my mouth, his window net fell. I watched as the emergency workers helped him out of the car and he slowly walked to the ambulance waiting to take him to the Infield Care Center.
“And that’s another hard hit for Brian Vickers. For some reason in the past few weeks the kid just can’t catch a br-“
I turned off the TV and threw the remote on the other bed. I didn’t care to watch anymore of the race if my Brian wasn’t in it.
The past 4 weeks while I’ve been gone, Brian has had one bad race after another. He had been 3rd in points before I left, and now he had fallen to 17th.
The first two weeks, it had looked like he was driving around the track without his heart being in it. But the past two were the hardest to watch.
Last week, he had gotten caught up in a wreck on lap 214. He was already 3 laps down, so it wasn’t like he was going to win, but it was still scary as hell watching him spin out into the wall, then slide down the track right in front of oncoming traffic. Luckily, the spotters were on their game that day, and nobody hit him.
This week was different though. This week, Robby Gordon had spun out in front of him, then Brian hit him in the left quarter panel, then Junior hit Brian, causing him to spin as well. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, I watched as Jamie smashed his car right into the drivers side of Brian’s and push him hard up against the wall.
There was no doubt in my mind after watching it that Jamie had done it on purpose. To the normal person who doesn’t know what’s going on (IE-my husband) it would just look like Jamie had gotten caught up in the wreck as well. But I knew Jamie better than that. I knew he was hell-bent to hurt Brian just to get to me. And I saw him drive straight into Brian’s car when he could have easily avoided it. It was at that point, last weekend, when I knew I had to go back. I couldn’t let Brian get killed just because I was scared. He had a right to know what was going on. He deserved to know why I had left. So that was why I was, once again, finding myself on the road back home to Indiana. The Brickyard 400 was in 4 days, and I planned to be there for the first practice at 10am tomorrow morning. I picked up my phone and dialed my sister’s cell number. “Hello?” “Hey Kaybear…” “KATY!” she practically yelled into the phone. “Oh my GOD! I’ve been worried sick about you. Are you alright? Are the twins alright? What’s going on? Where are you?” “Breathe little sister,” I told her. “Sorry, sorry,” she said. “I’m just so happy to hear your voice Kat.” “I know Kalen,” I told her. “Let me ask you something…” “I don’t like the sound of that. But ok…” “How excited would you be if I told you that you can see me tomorrow?” I asked, holding the phone away from my ear because I knew what was coming. “OH MY GAH!” I heard from where I was holding the phone a foot and a half away from my ear while I drove. “Really?” “Yes, really,” I told her, bringing the phone back to my ear. ”Yayness!” she said. “Wait til I tell Brian.” ”No.” ”What?” she asked a little confused. “Kat, you can’t see me and not him. That’s not fair to him. He’s your husba-“ “I know Kalen,” I told her. “Thanks mom.” “Sorry…” “All I meant was that I want to surprise him,” I said. “Ohhhh….that’s kinda cute,” she told me. “I can only imagine the look on his face when he sees you. He’s been so worried about you Kat. And he’s missed you so much. He’s having trouble racing without you. He can’t keep his mind in the car.” “I know,” I said quietly. “I’ve been watching.” “That why you’re coming back?” “I…I didn’t say I was coming back to stay Kalen…” I said. “Kat, you can’t do that to him again,” she told me sternly, sounding oddly like our mother. “I’m gonna tell him Kalen.” “I…what? Really?” she asked. “You promise?” “I promise,” I told her. “That’s why I’m coming back. That’s why I’m going to be there tomorrow, at first practice. He deserves to know the truth.” “Then why with the ‘I didn’t say I was coming back to stay’ shit, sis?” “Because I’m afraid that he’s going to turn me away after he finds out,“ I told her. “That he’s going to think I’m lying and that I cheated on him with Jamie.” “Pssssh…Come on Kat,” she said. “Have some faith in your husband that loves you more than anything else on earth.” “I know,” I said. “You’re right. I’m just worried. And I gotta go. I’m driving. I’ll see you tomorrow morning sisser. Love you.” After I hung up with Kalen, all I could do was concentrate on the road and what would happen when I showed up at the track tomorrow. ***************************************************************** Comments? | | |
| OK...so this is a rather short filler chapter to keep the people over at Nascar Lounge that were begging for an update at bay til I can think of something better to write. Therefore...it kinda sucks. But...enjoy!
Disclaimer-I don't own anybody you recognize. Least of all Brian Vickers. Although...I would like to have his babies. :katy
Chapter 2-
“Thank God for The N,” I said finally setting the remote down on the end table after finally settling on watching an old rerun of Daria.
It’d been two days since I called Brian, and I was missing him so much that I was about to go crazy. I couldn’t sleep. I wasn’t really eating either. I just wasn’t hungry.
I jumped about a foot in the air when I heard the front door open and close.
Mom and dad were both in bed, and nobody else lived here anymore. Not too mention the fact that I’d already locked all the doors.
So who on earth was barging in here at 3am?
“What in the fuck do you think you’re doing” I heard a voice say as the person barged into the rec room.
I didn’t have to look around to know who it was.
Hell…I probably should’ve known with the way she slammed the front door.
“Well hello to you too, Kalen.”
“Fuck hello,” she said, coming to stand in front of me. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Protecting my children.”
“And driving your husband freakin mad,” she said. “He’s crazy with worry Katy. Go back to him, and tell him what’s going on.”
“No,” I said, looking away from her.
“No? NO?” she said, looking at me in shock. “What the fuck do you mean no?”
“I mean no,” I said. “I’m not going back, and I’m not telling him.”
“I don’t think you understand,” she said, sitting down on the couch. “If you don’t tell him, I’m going to. I’m not leaving your husband there worrying about you like crazy. You might not care about him, but I do.”
“Oh don’t you even fucking go there with me Kalen Leigh!” I yelled. “You know better than to say I don’t care about Brian. You know I care more about him and the twins than anything else on earth. So fuck you. Don’t ever say that to me again.”
“I…I’m sorry Kat,” she said. “That was wrong. I’m sorry. But I still think he needs to know.”
“I know he does Kalen, but I can’t,” I told her, tears spilling out of my eyes. “I just can’t.”
“Why Katy? I don’t understand. I just…don’t get it.”
“I know you don’t Kaybear,” I told her. “And I know Jenny doesn’t either. But I just can’t. I can’t do it. How do I tell Brian that one of the babies he loves so much isn’t his? How do I tell him that one of his best friends raped his wife? How do I tell him that the same best-friend is threatening his wife and she ran because she was terrified of him? How do I say that?”
“I don’t know Kat,” she told me. “But you have to.”
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Kalen was passed out on the couch by 4:00.
But 5:15, I was on the road again, with the twins sleeping in the back.
I couldn’t stay there with Kalen threatening to run off and tell Brian. I couldn’t stay where he could find me and take me back.
I loved my sister, and I didn’t want to hurt her, but I couldn’t stay.
I also didn’t want her to worry though, so I had left her a note.
Kalen,
I love you sisser, but I have to leave.
I’m sorry.
Please don’t be mad at me for this.
I know you don’t understand why I feel that I have to do this, but please try to.
Try and put yourself in my position and think about how you would handle it.
It’s not as easy as you and Jenny seem to think it is.
Please don’t come looking for me.
You won’t find me.
I’ll call you soon.
I promise.
I love you sisser. Please don't forget that.
Katy
I know she’s going to be pissed at me for leaving like that, but I had to.
Nobody understood what I was going through.
Nobody.
How they could all just sit there and tell me to ‘go back and everything will be alright,’ was beyond me.
They hadn’t lived in the terror I had the past 10 months.
They didn’t have Holly’s husband practically stalking them.
Not one of them knew what I was going through. So how could they tell me how to deal with it? How could they tell me what to do? How could they think that I hadn’t already weighed all of my options and thought this was the best decision to protect my children? How could they think that I was doing the wrong thing? How did they know that going back wouldn’t be the wrong thing? That Jamie wouldn’t be waiting for me? That he wouldn’t already have plans in the works to kidnap the twins?
They didn’t.
Nobody could be sure of anything.
There were too many ‘what ifs’ for me to stay.
For me to go back.
For me to be anywhere where Jamie could find me.
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Comments? | | |
| Ok...so here's the sequal I've been promising ya'll. It's called....*drumrollllllllll*
I Can't Do This Anymore
Disclaimer-I don't own anybody you recognize. Least of all Brian Vickers. Although...I would like to have his babies.
Chapter 1-
I didn’t know where I was going. I was just driving, and hoping that the twins would stay asleep til I figured out what in the hell I was doing.
The morning after I left, I somehow found myself in Indiana. On the road back home. I hadn’t slept all night.
The twins had woken up about midnight, screaming their heads off. I stopped and fed them, changed them, then started out again once I got them back to sleep.
I was starting to see why people said not to take newborns on road trips.
But this was a necessity.
Wasn’t it?
I didn’t have a choice.
Did I?
Maybe I did.
Maybe I should have told Brian the truth. Maybe I should have at least left him a note to let him know where I was going.
God I missed him.
All I wanted right now was for him to hold me in his arms and tell me everything was going to be alright. To look at me with that trademark Vickers smile and make everything better.
But that wouldn’t work.
Not with this problem.
I had let it continue on too long without telling him the truth. If I told him now, he would hate me.
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At 10:45 the next morning I pulled into the driveway of the house I grew up in.
It wasn’t home to me anymore.
Home was wherever Brian was.
I saw the red front door swing open and a small boxer/lab mix dog come bounding out, barking his head off.
I climbed out of the car and shut the door so that he couldn’t get in and attack the twins, then bent down to pet him.
“Hey Rusty boy,” I said, rubbing his head as he licked around my face.
I smiled and petted him some more. I hadn’t smiled in days. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this was still home…at least a little bit.
“What’re you doing here?” I heard my mom ask as she got to me. “Brian has been calling at least 15 times an hour, worried sick. He’s been trying to call your cell, but said you had it turned off. He’s called everybody he could think of and even tried to file a missing person’s report but they said it was too early.”
“Hi mom,” I said, looking at her with tears in my eyes.
I knew Brian would be worried, but I didn’t want to tell him where I was.
He would just come and get me, and talk me into going back with him, and that wouldn’t solve anything.
It wouldn’t help keep my babies safe.
“What’s wrong Katy?” she asked, giving me a hug.
“I…” I started, then heard Noah start to cry. “Let’s get them inside and settled then I’ll tell you everything.”
After we had gotten the twins settled in my old bedroom for a nap, my mom made some cinnamon toast, like she used to when I was little and had a problem, and some coffee, and we sat down on the couch to talk.
I didn’t plan on telling her everything. I was planning on just telling her half of the story.
But it didn’t work that way.
Everything that had happened in the past 10 months came pouring out of me, and I didn’t stop until I was done. Until I had told her absolutely everything.
“Oh my God…” my mom said with her hand over her mouth. “My poor baby.”
She pulled me in for a hug and let me cry on her shoulder. I couldn’t stop. We sat there like that for a good 25 minutes. Me crying, and her rubbing my back and telling me that everything was going to be ok.
When I finally pulled back and wiped the tears off my face with the Kleenex she had handed me, she asked me the same question Kalen and Jenny had asked me so many times before.
The same question I’ve been asking myself for months.
“Why didn’t you tell Brian?”
“I…don’t know,” I said. “At first, it was because Jamie threatened me, and I was truly terrified of him. Hell, I still am, or I wouldn’t be here. Then it turned into me thinking that if I told him now he wouldn’t believe me, because I had waited so long. That he would think I had cheated on him, and was making it up.”
“Kathryn Jo Vickers,” she said, giving me that ‘mom’ look. “I can’t believe you would say such a thing. Brian loves you and the twins more than anything on this earth.”
“I know mom…” I said, then started to laugh.
“What on earth could possibly be funny you crazy girl?” she asked.
“I…I’m sorry mom,” I said, still laughing. “It’s just that…you haven’t been upset enough with me to call me by my whole name in a long time, and then you used my married name, and it just seemed weird. Then it turned to funny.”
“You’re a really weird girl.”
“Mom,” I said. “I’m 24-years-old. Are you just now figuring that out?”
“Well…no,” she told me. “But I’m gonna tell you something that I haven’t had the chance to say in a very long while.”
“You get more and more like your father every day,” we said at the same time, me in a mocking tone.
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I left the twins with my mom and went out to call Brian.
I explained to my mom that I didn’t want to do it from home, because I didn’t want anybody to know where I was.
Not even Brian.
He didn’t know what was going on, and there was too much of a chance that he might tell Jamie, and that was the LAST thing I wanted to happen. I didn’t want Jamie to have any clue where I was.
I was gone a long time. I drove for a little over 2 hours, until I got to the Indiana/Michigan state line before I finally pulled over and found a pay phone to use.
Like I said…I wasn’t taking ANY chances. Not with Noah and Brianna.
I picked up the phone and dialed the number on my phone card and then dialed my house.
Brian picked up half-way through the first ring.
“Katy? Baby? Is that you?”
“It’s me Bri…” I said, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill out just at the sound of his voice.
“Where are you?” he asked. “I’m coming to get you.”
“I…I can’t tell you that Brian,” I said quietly. “I don’t want you to come and get me.”
“Katy…” he said with hurt in his voice.
Just hearing that made the tears that I’d been trying to hold off, come spilling over the edge.
“Brian, I’m sorry baby.”
“Kat, why?” he asked, the hurt still evident in his voice. “What did I do? I don’t understand.”
“Oh baby,” I said. “You didn’t do anything. I promise. I love you more than life itself Brian, and being away from you…it’s killing me.”
“Then come home Princess,” he said. “Please come home. I love you so much. I need you here.”
“I…I just can’t Brian,” I said. “I’m so sorry. I have to go. I’ll call you soon. I love you. So much. Please don’t forget that.”
I hung up before he had a chance to say anything else. Truth was, a few more seconds of him telling me how much he loved me, and begging me to come home, and I would’ve cracked. I would’ve told him where I was, and to come and get me now.
But I couldn’t do that. There were more important things to consider. Like the safety of Brianna and Noah.
I got back in my car and started out on the 2-hour journey back to my parents’ house.
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Comments? | | |
| Ya'll ready for me to get started with the sequal over here? | | |
| Ok...here ya go...FYI...for those of you that read my Power Rankings last season...yes...I am doing them again...but on my Myspace...here's the link: http://www.myspace.com/vickersette25 They're posted as a blog. Add me and comment!
Disclaimer never changes...mostly cause I'm too lazy to write a new one.
Chapter 22-
“Well?” Kalen asked when I walked into her and Kasey’s new house carrying the twins.
“I’ll know when they call me I guess,” I said. “Hey Jenny,” I added, seeing her on the couch. “What is this? A make-Katy-feel-better-because-her-son-is-Holly’s-step-son party?”
“Not even funny,” Kalen said, taking Brianna from me.
“We just want to be here for you honey,” Jenny said.
”I know. I’m sorry,” I said, sitting next to her, still holding Noah. “I’m just freaked out by this whole mess.”
”It’d be a lot fucking easier if you’d just told Brian from the start,” Kalen said under her breath.
”You think I don’t know that Kalen?” I asked her. “You think I don’t wish every single day that I had just told Brian from the start?”
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I just…”
”You just nothing,” I said, glaring at her. “Shut up about it, ok? I know. I know, I know, I FUCKING KNOW!”
“Sorry…”
I handed Noah over to Jenny and went and sat down on the floor in front of my sister, leaning my chin on her knee like she used to do to me when she was little and there was something she really wanted to talk about.
“I’m sorry Kaybear,” I said, looking up at her with Brianna in her arms. “I’m just freaked out by this whole mess. I mean…one of my children might not belong to my husband. And Jamie…he swears up and down that he’s taking them both. He thinks they’re both his. And I couldn’t stand to lose either one of them. Especially to that man.”
“I know Kat,” she said, looking down at me sadly. “But darlin’, Jamie isn’t getting either one of the twins sweetie. For one, he has no rights to Brianna, she’s not his. And for two, no judge would ever award custody to a father who raped the mother honey. So stop freaking about it.”
“He won’t care,” I said, leaning the side of my head on her knee and looking at the ground, trying not to cry. “He’ll just up and take them. I know he will.”
“Neither Brian, nor you, will ever let that happen Kat,” Jenny told me. “He won’t touch them.”
“Like he would never hurt me?” I asked, looking over at her. “Isn’t that what you said? He’d never hurt me, because Brian would never let him?”
“I…”
“No,” I said, standing up. “You told me that at my birthday party Jennifer, when I told you that he was scaring me.”
“I…I know I did,” she said.
“And since then, he’s raped me,” I said, ticking things off on my fingers. “Tried to kill me, and the twins. Tried to kill my husband on the racetrack. And now, I guarantee you that he’s gonna try and steal the twins or something.”
“Kat-“ she started, but stopped when I reached over and pulled Noah out of her arms.
”Stop,” I said. “ I don’t fucking wanna hear it anymore.”
“Katy…” Kalen said, when I took Brianna from her and put her in her carrier.
”NO!” I said, picking them both up. “I’m sick of hearing your damn fucking reassurances that Jamie’s not going to do anything.”
And with that, I opened the door and stormed out, but not before hearing my sister yell one last thing at me.
”THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD TELL YOUR FUCKING HUSBAND!”
***************
I didn’t want to go home.
Not to Brian.
Not to a message on the answering machine from the doctor.
Not to anything.
Not yet.
Instead, I went to the store. We needed groceries anyway, and it got my alone for a while.
Well…sort of alone.
But the twins were good company. They didn’t yell at me for being scared. They didn’t care that I wasn’t strong enough to stand up for myself. All they knew was that I loved them, and that was all that mattered.
I somehow managed to get them both situated in a cart (not buggie you silly southern people) with enough room to get a small amount of food in it for the next few days.
As I walked around the grocery store, playing with the twins every now and then to keep them occupied, I kept feeling like somebody was watching me. I kept telling myself that I was crazy. There were over a hundred people in there, it was a busy day, somebody’s eyes, at some point, are going to have to move over me to look at something else.
That’s all it is.
The next time I felt it, I turned around to see if anybody was there.
Nothing. Just people shopping. Mostly women with kids in tow, just like me.
So then why couldn’t I shake the feeling that I was being followed around?
Next time I felt it, I turned around again.
Just in time to see what I thought was a blonde head duck back around the corner.
“Surely not,” I said out loud, causing Noah to start cooing. “Mommy’s just going insane, isn’t she honey? Yeah…”
Looks around again, and sees Jamie clearly this time.
“Ok, maybe not,” I said. “Time to go home to daddy.”
I picked up both baby carriers and walked in the opposite direction from where Jamie was standing. I went right to my car and hooked the twins in, then started up, locking the doors, and getting ready to back out.
I guess I wasn’t quick enough.
The next thing I knew, I heard a bang on my window, and looked to see Jamie standing there with an evil grin on his face. He tried to open my door, but it was locked. Moved to the door behind me, but it was locked too. I took a deep breath to try and calm myself, then backed out of the parking spot as fast as I could, almost hitting another car, but I didn’t care.
I didn’t stop til I got home. Ran 3 stop lights, and 6 stop signs in the process, but that didn’t matter to me. I just wanted to be home and safe in Brian’s arms.
Too bad he wasn’t there.
There was, however, a message on my answering machine.
“Mrs. Vickers, this is Dr. Foyler. I need for you to call me back as soon as possible, I have your test results.”
Shaking so hard I could barely move, I dialed the number and told them who I was, waiting for the doctor to come to the phone.
“Mrs. Vickers,” he said after clicking on the line. “Hi, I have your test results here.”
“Just give it to me straight please.”
“Alright…” he said. “Your daughter, does in fact, belong to your husband. But there is no doubt that your son does not. As I told you before, the is a rare occ-“
I didn’t hear the rest.
I didn’t want to hear the rest.
I dropped the phone back on the cradle as tears started falling out of my eyes, and sat there for the next 10 minutes, trying to figure out what I was going to do.
Then it came to me.
I knew what I had to do to keep my babies safe.
I went upstairs and packed some clothes for them, and some for me as well. Got diapers and bottles and anything else I would need, and put it in my Tahoe before going back in for the twins.
As I was walking toward the door, I took a look around my house, that I shared with the man that I loved, wondering if I would ever see it or him again.
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THE END! | | |
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